My sons love to roughhouse, and I’ve got the bruises to prove it

Tween boys are as rough and tough as they can be. I know this because I have two — an 11-year-old and a 10-year-old, both full of energy and getting bigger and stronger every day.

They both also love to roughhouse — to wrestle, play fight, roll around, and tickle — but roughhousing with my sons is a challenge for me and can leave me with literal battle scars because of one of my rare diseases, immune thrombocytopenia (ITP), which I developed in 2018. ITP causes my immune system to destroy my blood platelets, and one of my symptoms is easy bruising. Just poking my arm with a fingertip can leave a bruise that lasts for days. Larger ones can last for weeks.

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My battle scars

After we play around, my body is often covered in an array of handprints, finger marks, and wide, purple bruises. Nearly every play session ends with me fussing at my oldest son to stop being so rough.

While it’s generally not dangerous to have lots of bruises, it can sure be unsightly, and I’ve gotten some strange looks from people. And, of course, it can hurt if I bump them by accident or touch them.

When my doctor sees me covered in bruises, he wants to know how I got them, because it’s important to keep track of unexplained bruising. With ITP, I’m at risk for blood clots and internal bleeding, and I’ve had a blood clot in my leg once already.

A bruise from a blood clot tends to be more pronounced, however. It’s usually larger and darker than normal bruises, and is hot to the touch. It can also hurt without being touched and usually only develops on an arm or leg.

Obviously, if I don’t want to be covered in bruises, I could just not horseplay with my sons. After all, bruising so easily is a constant reminder of how sick I truly am. But it’s not their fault I’m sick, and those moments when I do feel well enough to play around with them make me feel normal and like they get to have a normal mom again, like I used to be before I got sick, even if it’s just for a little while.

So I’ll keep wrestling with my rough and tumble boys until I can’t anymore. They deserve to have fun and be silly with their mom. I want to give them as much normal as I can after the challenges we’ve been through.

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